My all-important musing on what I liked and disliked from 2002 (this little series should be completed in May, or so) would be incomplete if I didn't tell you, the gentle reader, what twisted my knob in music (ouch) this past year. I can't help but note that music was dominated by bands with ridiculous names. Super Furry Animals, Queens of the Stone Age, The Flaming Lips, Supergrass, Cannibal Ox, Death in Vegas and Solomon Burke all made terrific records this year. Ok, Solomon Burke is a soul legend who's name really is Solomon Burke, but I digress. These albums all had, respectively, nice dollops of Beach Boys via Wales, death metal, acid drenched Oklahoman church choir harmonies, Peter Pan with mascara, hip-hop abstract expressionism, a nice Kenneth Anger fetish and the Wisdom of the Well Lived Life. I must say that I was pretty underwhelmed by the Wonder (White Bread) Boys of hip-hop, Eminem and Mike Skinner (a.k.a. that dude behind The Streets). I like Eminem only when he is in brat mode. I don't care that he's shooting fish in a barrel when he's going after such well-known hard asses as Will Smith and Moby, I just think it's funny. I don't think I ever need to hear about his mom again, though. Fuck, Marshal, you have more mummy issues than King Tut and John Lennon combined. Enough. Interesting that he's starting to sample 70's FM album rock now, though. I always figured there was a lot Kid Rock lurking under that blonde dye (as well as Kid 'n Play, but E wouldn't admit *that*). Revolutionary, right? M&M's British counterpart hasn't been shoved down our gullet in quite the same relentless way, but give our friends at Viacom, Sony, Vivendi and Fox (pick yer conglomerate) time. I think a lot of UK observers responded to this the same way people in Alabama yee-haw and do the cotton-eyed joe over the band Alabama- "hey, these songs are about *me*...about where *I* live and what *I* do!" The rest of the world doesn't really give a fuck, but the world takes more of cue from even Birmingham, UK than they do from Birmingham, AL. Oh, the injustice. With a banjo on my knee, I must say that I am somewhat predjudiced against "Original Pirate Material" because of the none too healthy portions of UK garage and pointless R&B cauterwalling filling Mr. Skinner's otherwise eggs-n-chips covered plate. I hate that shit. And, really, judging from the lyrical content, the group should be called "Mum's Living Room" before "The Streets." Lots of hardcore playstation and sitting on the couch science, yo. Does "keeping it real" mean giving every boring ass detail of your spotty life? Oh, well...inverting an old American rhyme (and hymn), this music wasn't made for you and me, anyway.

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